Into the Dark, and Out of my Mind

Into the Dark, and Out of my Mind

If only. . .


If only you could hear, the screams that echo in my head,

Never dimming, never going away.

They torture my soul, but ring throughout my body, making me completely aware of my pain.


If only you could hear, the ringing in my ears never dimming,

Never going away they never leave me in silence,

Where I choose to be, but echo in my mind, making me completely aware that I'm slowly going deaf.


If only you could hear, my joints cracking with every move I make,

Never stopping, never failing to be painful.

Causing my tortured soul and the screams in my head, as my joints pull themselves in and out of their sockets, dislocating every so often for nothing at all.


If only you could feel, the pain that taunts every waking minute of my days .

You would never last three seconds as me, the screams alone would drive a normal person insane.

The only time I am free is in my dreams, where i feel no pain, and yet, every dream is a nightmare.


If only you knew, what it is like to be me,

What it is like to feel what I feel and hear what I hear every second that I am awake never dimming, never fading.

And yet, feeling like knives are stabbing through my concious mind at every waking second.


If only I could be, normal and free.

The pain being so intense that I am constantly dizzy.

I cannot do what everyone else finds easy without extreme pain and discomfort,

I cannot even watch television without my joints screaming out for help.


If only you knew what I feel every day...